The Divine Trials

REMINDER: Before I Start...

I Share Past Related Events As GROWTH Not Because I Am Stuck In The Past. People Assume When You Speak About The Past.. It's Like You're Stuck In It. No.. It's Called Examples Of Knowledge And How We Were Able To Cope Or Grow From. I Realize Sometimes We Should Share Our Experiences To Help Others To Realize Or Be Emotionally Prepared In Case They Are Dealing Or Will Deal With It. I've Helped A Lot Of My Friends Dodge Bullets Or Become Self-Aware Of What They Are Dealing With. I Was Able To Save A Marriage, Help Through A Divorce Gone Wrong, Teach Karmic Link Souls For Lessons Of Romance And Match Relationships. I've Seen It All And Dealt With It. Like My Teacher Was Pointing Out To Me Yesterday And Everyone In Class. The Healer Goes Through Their Own Wounds Of Growth, And They Share Their Knowledge. I've Always Believed I Had Healer Energy With My Chiron In Cancer.

Ever Since This Song Came Into My Path.. I Really Connected To It. It's Funny Because I Knew Someone Who Was From The Air Force Military. He Hated This Song... I Always Wondered To Myself.. Why? I Wonder If It Was A Trigger. Hm.. Starset Does Speak About Military Space Government. I Feel Like He Was Trying To Manipulate Me To The Point Of Brain Washing Me Into His Own And It Didn't Work. I Kept Dodging Bullets Each Time And It Would Irritate Him. I Already Deal With Military/Police Energy All My Life In Family ... I Don't Need That Type Of Energy In My Partnerships Unless You Can Control Yourself. I Remember Learning That A Pisces Can Become A Cancer Or A Scorpio. This Person Was Into Scorpios But I Wasn't A Scorpio. I Could Act Like One But I Am Not One But Strangely Enough. I Was Asked One Day If I Was A Scorpio Rising.. I Was So Confused Because I Didn't Feel Like A Scorpio. I Felt More Like A Aquarius Rising But Now I Am Shifting Again?

Observation: 

I Started To Go Deep Into Thought And I Realized..
Interesting.. Sometimes When We Write Something, Sing Something Or Just A Thought Coming Up In Our Minds. It's Like A Radio Wave Connecting Into Your Antenna To Express Or Feel What May Come Through.

This Song Is The Chariot With The Tower.. 2023 Is Chariot And Tower Energy Within Our Change.

If You Have Chariot And Tower In Your Birth Date. You Are Basically Like The Scorpio Transformation Of Yourself And Everything Around You. You're Constantly Having A Rebirth To Become A Better Person. You Might Have A Change Of Personality Often From The Changes Of Moon Phases Happening In Your Aura. Mostly At Night.. You're Wide Awake And You Tend To Have A Difficult Time Sleeping. Certain Things Makes You Happy Like Music, Certain Foods, A Person's Warmth Or Just Happy Memories.

Pluto Is Going Through The Change Of Capricorn To Aquarius. Saturn Has Now Changed From Aquarius To Pisces. The Libra Full Moon Is Coming Up And We Will Have Our First Aries New Moon Solar Eclipse For The New 2023. The Chariot Represents Cancer And Tower I Consider That Scorpio But When You Research It. It's The Aries That Represents The Tower. Aries And Scorpio Share Mars Together Shouldn't This Still Be A Scorpio Energy Too?

Full Moon Pink Moon Libra April 6,2023= 17 The Star 8 Strength

A Wonderful Time To Wish For A Balance In Your Life With The Power Of Venus And The Justice Card Of Libra. I Believe Venus Libra Will Have A Very Strong Luck Under Their House. I Believe If You Have Venus In Libra And In The 1st House With Aries. It's Going To Be Such A Beautiful Transformation Of Mind Body And Soul. It Might Be Overwhelming In The Beginning Because Its Like You Are Shedding Out Old Skin. You're Like A Snake! Or You Could Have Dragon Energy In Your Chinese Zodiacs. Awww I Love Both Of Them!

The Star Represents Aquarius And Strength Leo. I Believe The Energy Of Aquarius In Sun, Moon And Rising Will Have A Beautiful Effect On This. When It Comes To Your Leo Placements, I See A VERY Strong Balance And Removing Of Wounds.

Now Let Me Share Something Here.. I Legit Got A Star Tattoo On The Left Side Of My Back Close To My Neck. Magenta Pink, Medium Size On My Back.. On The Day Of 12 And 3. The Hanged Man And Empress.. I'm Not Sure.. What Is Going On When I Have These Random Experiences. But When I Do.. I Sit Down For A Moment And Start To Do My Random Researches.

The Meaning Of April 1,2023

The Empress Has Surrendered To Give Faith Into The Universe And Allow It To Flow Back In. She Will Accept The Trials Of Healing.. Chiron Has A Conjunction With The Sun Of Aries And Chiron Is In Cancer For Myself. I Am Going Through A Transformation And Letting Go What Has Been Hurting Me. I Finally Was Able To Step On Top Of The Mirror And Crack It. Finally.. Balance Will Come For Me In My Virgo Moon In The 7th House In Libra. I Can Finally Repair My Connections And Try To Clear Out All The Toxic Energy Of That Symbiotic Energy. I Am Also Repairing My Self In Mind Body And Soul With Pisces Sun And Aquarius Rising In 1st House. My 3 Main Placements Will Go Into A Rebirth Again.

Hm.. Is This What Jotaro Felt? When He Was 17 And Connected With The Star Card 17 To Gain Strength Of 8 To Become A Stand User? I Get It.. I Understand Now.

Pink Star: Good Health And Prosperity.

Into The Dates Of The Beginning Of Aries April 1-7th 2023

• Saturday: 4/1/2023 The Hanged Man And Empress = You Must Surrender And Trust In Yourself. 
• Sunday: 4/2/2023 The Death Card And Emperor = You Must Learn To Accept Change 
• Monday: 4/3/2023 The Temperance And Hierophant = You Must Learn That Balance Is The Key For True Happiness In Self And Connections.
• Tuesday: 4/4/2023 The Devil And The Lover = You Must Learn That Lust/Temptation Isn't The Key For True Happiness. You Must Love Oneself Before Being With Other.
• Wednesday: 4/5/2023 The Chariot And The Tower = You Must Learn To Accept The Tower Burning Down To Accept A New Beginning To Enter Quickly In.
• Thursday: 4/6/2023 Full Moon In Libra The Star And The Strength = You Must Manifest Calmly With The Strength Of The Lion's Braveheart For A New Beginning To Enter. Remember How The Balancer Works.. Stay Positive During This Time Of Change.
• Friday: 4/7/2023 The Moon And The Hermit = You Must Learn To Become The Hermit Filled With Wisdom During Moon Phases Of Emotions.
• Saturday: 4/8/2023 The Sun The Wheel Of Fortune And Magician = You Must Become Your Own Magician To Trust Your Own Wheel Spin For The Sun Is Here To Bring You Happiness.
• Sunday: 4/9/2023 Judgement High Priestess = You Must Follow Your Intuition During Strong Self-Growth
• Monday: 4/10/7 Universe And Empress = The Empress Must Learn To Trust In The Universe With Her Trials Of Lessons Throughout The Days.

Is This Real?
'Cause I Can't Feel
I Reach Into The Darkness
And There's Nothing To Hold
Try To Heal
But Spin My Wheels
The More I Try To Stop This
The More I Lose Control

Am I Just A Ghost In My Own Machine?
In A Sandbox In The Entropy?
Some Reality Got A Hold Of Me
And I Don't Think I'll Escape
Am I Too Attached To A Memory?
Stuck In My Head For Eternity
Am I In A Dream Or The In Between?
I Don't Think

-Starset Waking Up

Solar Eclipse New Moon Aries April 20,2023= 13 The Death And 4 Emperor

Funny How Aries And Scorpio Share Mars. Scorpio Is The Death Card Of Transformation In Your Life While Emperor Is Your Masculine. Seems Like The Masculine Side Of You Or The Masculine Divine Will Go Through Another Transformation. If You Have Aries In Your Placements And Also Check If Your Houses Have 1st (Aries) Or 8th House (Scorpio). I Know BIG TIME I Am Going To Be Overwhelmed For Both Lunar Phases. My Sun Moon Rising Is Going To Be Ripped Apart Again Lol.. I Got This Weird Feeling Also.. TMI But Why Does Lilith Want Me To Bleed During Full Moons? Heh And Mostly My Black Lilith Is Libra In 8th House Of Scorpio. What's Going On Here? I Am A Blood Lunar Eclipse Baby..I Was Able To Get 98% Of It With My Waning Gibbous. Shes Going To Do Something To My Sun In Pisces, Rising And Venus In Aquarius In 1st House And Virgo Moon In 7th House. I Personally Don't Work Much With Lilith Because She Has Her Little Moments Of Selfishness And Working With Her Can Be Toxic. I've Done My Fair Share Of Toxic Stuff And I Rather Not Deal With That. If She Wants To Do Something To Me.. I Will Let Her Change My Appearance. I Already Got Deep Purple Hair Now. What Else Would You Like? Can You Change Me?

You're The Pulse In My Veins
You're The War That I Wage
Can You Change Me?
Can You Change Me?

You're The Love That I Hate
You're The Drug That I Take
Will You Cage Me?
Will You Cage Me?

-Monster /Starset

I Realized When I Posted These Songs About A Past Experienced Of What I Was Dealing With. Now I Am Much More Balanced Than I Was In My Past In 2019-May 2022. Just Watching Certain Tv Shows Or Movies Really Reminds Me.. How Much I Have Grown Throughout My Trials, And I Am Still Learning At The Moment. It's A Very Interesting Type Of Discipline Honestly.

Years Back.. I Would Sing These Songs Loudly Because I Was Going Through Trials In My Life. I Wasn't Realizing What Was Going On With Myself. I Was Signing Contracts Over And Over With Obstacles That Kept Teaching Me About Myself. I Started To Hate Dealing With The Person I Was With Because That Same Person Was Mirror Of Me And It Was Teaching Me To Grow Up. Is That Why I Would Get So Angry? I Would Want To Punch The Walls? And Walk Away From The Apartment To Avoid More Anger From Being Seen? Every Single Time I Got Into An Argument.. Its Like I Wanted To Rip The Person's Head Off. That's Not Me.. I Dont Ever Want To Be That Way But I Realized.. I Was Going Through A Trial And I Was Going Through A Transformation Of Self. I Had To Face My Own Mirror To Let Go Of The Old Me And Grow Up. I Was Facing My Childhood Self In A Shadow Work In Front Of Person That I Thought Could Have Been A Future. He Was A Cancer Connecting With My Chiron And Their Aries Was Connecting With My Sun In Pisces, Aquarius Venus And Rising. The Person Was Transforming Me Into Someone That I Needed To Become.

Watch Them All Lie Down
Watch The Eyeless Gain Control, Gain Control!
They Could Never Blind Me

I Clench The Fist
And Overtake It All
I Navigate The Endless Rise And Fall
You Push My Back Against The Wall
When I Attack I'm Taking All

I'm Taking It All
Rise And Fall

One More Fits Inside The Mold
One Last Chance To Break The Hold, Break The Hold!

-Starset Rise And Fall

Chiron In Cancer In The 5th House: Leo Also The Sun (Pleasure, Love And Amusement)

This Experience Of Energy Of Cancer Has Really Taught Me A Lot About Myself And Who I Am. Not Only Was It A Cancer Sun.. But It Had Aries Moon Which Drove Me Mad? I Dont Think I Ever Really Felt This Way Before.. But When I Think Back On It And Reminds Me Of My Past Experience That I Blurred Out. I Realized That I Dealt With 3 Karmic Aries Moon Males That Destroyed Me. 14 Years Of Bullshit That Really Kicked Me To The Curve And Made Me Feel Like I Was The Crazy One. 3 Years With An Aquarius Sun Aries Moon, 4 Years With A Capricorn Sun Aries Moon And 7 FUCKING YEARS With Cancer Sun Aries Moon. I Think What Makes Me So Angry Is.. The Whole Time There Was SIGNS ALL AROUND ME And I Surrendered Like The Little Hopeless Bitch That I Am. Because I Was Learning To Grow Up And I Needed A Reality Check.

There's This App Named The Pattern And That App Is Spooky. Im Not Kidding When I Say This.. I Placed Dates From The Past Into This App And It Has Made Me Cry From How Accurate It Is. I Was Supposed To Go Through This Last Trial Because I Need To Prepare For My Future. I Myself See So Much Blur In Front Of Me That My Eyes Feel Like Its Losing Its Vision. I Am So Scared But I Am Trying My Best To Trust In Chiron And The Changes Throughout The Universe. I'm Learning While I Grow And I Realized This Whole Time ..

I Was Foolish To Judge A Scorpio And I Judged Them All My Life For One Traumatic Past Event That Happened To Me. I Was Wrong.. The Whole Time I Had Scorpios In My Life That Taught Me, Saved Me, And Transformed Me. I Was Poorly Judging The Zodiac Sign And Didn't Realize It Was A Support Group Of People. They Are Misunderstood And They Are Wonderful People.. I Adore Them.

Hello There

I Truly Do Miss This One Scorpio And When I Think About The Energy. The Only Thing I Do Is Smile And Just Keep On Being Positive. I Hope One Day They Will Understand How Much I Care For Them And Always Will Since The Beginning Of Time. I Know Them For Years And The Interesting Part About This. The Energy That Brought Us Together Was Libra Energy. Its Been 7 Years Of Knowing This Person And During These Times Of My Life. I Had My Own Trials Of Growth Between Us And The Connection. The Energy Has Never Been Toxic Even If They May Assume That It Is Or Self-Punish Themselves For It. I Really Wish That They Would Stop That And Just Believe That I Understand YOU. I Truly Do Even If You Think I Don't. I Never Once Felt Suffocated, Disgusted Or Miserable About This Person. I Always Felt This Warm Energy Filled Of Peace, Protection And Support Of Love. Every Single Time I Was Around With This Person .. I Felt Nervous Because I Am Insecure Of My Own Communication And Vocabulary.. But I Always Tried My Best To Stay Strong And Feel Confident. The Energy Always Kept Me Relaxed And It Felt So Heavenly. When I Felt Like The Person Was Connecting With Me... I Would Become So Comfortable That I Would Express Myself. Ugh.. Why Am I So Chatty When Im Happy? Just The Thought Of The Energy Makes Me Miss It More. I Miss You..

Können Sie Bitte Zurückkommen Und Einfach Noch Einmal Mit Mir Sprechen

My Opinion:

This 7 Year Trial Taught Me Something.. I Am Ready For The New Opportunities In My Life And I Am Able To Realize What's Wrong And Good For Me. I Am Able To Control My Emotions And I Am Able To Express Myself Without Fear. Yeah.. I Am Still Learning To Set Healthy Boundaries Because I Am Too Much Of A Giver. I Would Admit That I Have Two Sides Of Me And I've Realized That For Years.

There's The Caring Side Of Me That I Give The World To You And Give You All My Love. I Will Be Supportive, And I Would Take Everything In. I Will Service You With Everything That I Feel Is Worth Giving To You.(Scorpio)

And.. There's That Side Of Me That I Don't Like Showing And I Become Hurtful. I Insult You With Words That Stab You Through The Heart Like Sharp Knife. I Could Just Ghost You And Not Speak To You Ever Again. Sometimes I Just Give You The Cold Shoulder And Act Dry About Anything You Say. That...Energy Has Been A Rough Type Of Personality That I Do Not Want To Bring Out.(Cancer)

It Seems Like The Scorpios Have Always Gotten The Good Energy From Me And The Cancers Got The Bad Energy Of Me.

Mind You.. I Am Speaking About The Sun. Cancer Moon-Cancer Rising Are Much More Supportive, Caring And Loving To Me. I Don't Think I Ever Dealt With Problems With Scorpio Sun Moon And Rising Expect For A Past Traumatic Experience Years Back When I Was 19 But Everything Else Has Been Great. 

The Full Moon Is Coming Soon In Libra And Libra Is About The Partnerships We Have With Others. We Are Dealing With Change Throughout The Universe And Things Are Becoming A Big Overwhelming Shift. I Consider This A Reality Check Honestly And I Feel Like A Lot Of People Need A Wakeup Call. I Started To Have This Shift For The Past 3 Years Now? May 2021 Was A Very Difficult Year, May 2022 Was Amazing Year Of Abundance And May 2023.. Oh God I Feel Like Everything Is Going To Come To Me With Full Force And Unexpected. Who Fucking Knows But I Am Ready Like Always.